I received this rather odd email one day.
From: "Jonathan Siegler" email@example.com
Subject: talk to me like that again....
Sent: Thu, 20 Nov 2003
then your going down you hear!
I honestly could not remember ever talking bad about anyone named Jonathan Siegler, so I wondered who this oaf-tard was and what sort of pharmaceutical based emergency he was undergoing at the time. Since I was curious, I sent back a reply asking Mr. Siegler exactly what his problem was.
From: "Black Echo"
To: "Jonathan Siegler" firstname.lastname@example.org
Subject: In reply...
Sent: Thu, 20 Nov 2003
Dear Mr. Siegler,
I don't have the faintest idea who you are or what you are talking about.
If you have sent me email from another email address, please indicate which
one so that I may review your grievance with me or if you would be so kind
as to remind me of the animosity that apparently exists between us as I
am unfamiliar with such a disagreement.
As for your laughable attempt at a threat, I can't take seriously any idiot
who doesn't know the difference between "your" and "you're" or how to use
which word in the correct manner. You also need to learn the difference
between a declaration, an exclamation, and an interrogative when you are
attempting to communicate with another member of the human species.
Your obvious lack of education greatly reduces your credibility and severely
undermines any threat which you laughably try to present.
Christopher T. Shields -"BLACK ECHO"-
"I'm not black like Barry White, I'm white like Frank Black."
Step into my world at: http://www.goingfaster.com
Mr. Sieglerís reply was everything I could
have ever hoped it would be and more.
Subject: Re: In reply...
Sent: Fri, 21 Nov 2003 08:16:32 -0600
To make a long story short, I'm an idiot and you are the best and know
how to use your words in a un intellegent manner.
Sorry if I thought your web page called me a dumb and stupid idiot. I bet
one day someone will put you in your place.
P.S. there was no need to respond to my email like that, you must have
tooo much time on your hands. bye.
Hope you improve!
Office Depot Logistics
Account Service Rep./Lansing IL#3066
>Mannnn, To make a long story short, I'm an idiot and you are the best and know how to use your words in a un intellegent manner.
Yes, I believe that sums up the situation quite nicely. I especially liked the part where you misspelled the word ďintelligentĒ as that really was the frosting on the cake, so to speak.
>Sorry if I thought your web page called me a dumb and stupid idiot.
Apology accepted though I still donít have a clue as to what you are talking about and I doubt you do either.
My suggestion would
be that you leave the Ďthinkingí part in life to people who are far more
suited to it than you are. I further suggest that you check your
facts first before you randomly threaten someone you do not know,
with no better reason for doing so other than you Ďthoughtí that they
might have made fun of you. Iím sure that if you take my advice, you will avoid
over ninety-nine percent of all the as-of-yet-undelivered ass beatings that I feel you are surely destined for in this life.
> I bet one day someone will put you in your place.
You used the word
ďyourĒ correctly. I am so proud! Yes, someday someone will put me in my place
(just as I am now putting you in your place) but Iím afraid that it wonít be
you, Sparky, now or ever.
>P.S. there was no need to respond to my email like that, you must have tooo much time on your hands. bye.
Oh for the love of Dolly Madison!
Apparently, a two
paragraph email now counts as Ďtoo much time on your handsí and this
coming from a mongotard who is proud to work for Office Depot in logistics.
Logistics! This means that your highest position in life and our society
so far is that you fetch small items and boxes of important stuff and faithfully
bring them to people far smarter than you. Apparently, your whole career is
based around a simple menial task that we could otherwise teach to the dumbest
of canines and in the last few decades, even to chimpanzees and orangutans as
Iím sure that career rewards for your chosen profession include some form of tasty snack and a quick pat on the head for a job well done. On the other hand, Iím convinced that youíve probably seen the business end of a rolled up magazine or newspaper and had your face rubbed in your errors to the tone of a harsh scolding more times than you would ever admit to.
As for my response, I thought my email was quite civil in return, especially since your email threat had no basis for ever being sent. Iím guessing your strap-on ego is merely the sad by-product of excessive masturbating combined with watching way too much professional wrestling.
>Hope you improve!
I get better all the time, thanks.
Oh, and in case you
didnít figure it out, Iím definitely making fun of you on my site now.
Feel free to send me more bravo sierra bravado laced email, chimp.